Dreameyce Studio Blog

It’s been forever since I’ve blogged. I’ve missed it, but I’ve been angry, heartbroken, and busy stomping around pissed at the digital world over all the stress it’s given! Over the holidays my laptop croaked unexpected. Wrong place, wrong time. OUCH. Somehow in the middle of all that the billing for my hosting didn’t go through, and without a computer I didn’t notice for a few days. 5 days after the hosting lapsed GoDaddy purged, then DELETED my entire website. Everything. Apparently, despite being a huge, multi million dollar corporation, they keep NO backups of info once they purge it. OMG! I’m so heartbroken!

Not so terrible with the studio website, which was in the middle of a total overhaul, but the blog hadn’t been backed up. I had tried multiple times to do so, unable to figure it out on my own so kept backburnering it. Trusting my hosting company to be reliable, and kind. Well damn me, for assuming the best of others! Wow  Some of my posts I can go through and copy/paste from internet archives, but what really breaks my heart to have lost is the family posts which were private. Including the blog posts I had written on my phone each night in the motel during our move from Oregon to Texas. All gone. And according to irresponsible GoDaddy, forever. I’m heartbroken, and emotionally devastated.

I have switched hosting to a new company, DailyData.net, a local company which has helped me set up auto backups from my blog for when I do get back into blogging, and they also keep backups of client data. Something that I had assumes all hosting companies would do, as it seemed like it’d be common sense!

SO much has happened since I stopped blogging last, and I’ve missed cataloging life in general. I wish I could get my beloved past family posts back but guess it needs to just be a hard, painful lesson learned the hard way to trust no one, no matter how reputable a company should be. And, learn how to back up those pesky WordPress blog posts!

Welcome to WordPress. This is your first post. Edit or delete it, then start blogging!

This post was originally posted here Thursday August 07th 2008, 1:36 pm, but GoDaddy deleted and purged my entire hosting account and without a backup I lost everything I can not figure out a way to backdate posts, so I’m left not only copy/pasting old blog posts, but not having any sort of date order unless I figure out a way.

Traum passed away 9/12/12 to complications of cancer. When I saw this past post while digging up my blog archives it hit me like a ton of bricks.

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The topic on the cloned Pit Bull puppies has been a really hot topic among dog rescue, and pet groups. Discussions on selfishness, blind hope, and insanity have been used on this topic. One blog post on Frogdog Blog really touched on my opinion on the matter, so I wrote a comment about what my decision would be.

After reading about the cloned Pittys the other day, I did ask myself, “If I could afford to clone Traum, would I?” I even looked him in the eyes when I asked myself that question. Maybe someday, I won’t forgive myself for this decision, when his soft fur, and beating heart are no longer within my reach.

The post is here: http://bullmarketfrogs.com/blog/?p=620

And the quote that stood out is this: “But have you ever really loved a dog? Really? The kind that tears you in half if you think about walking through the world without them? The kind that makes it impossible for you to imagine the hole they leave behind? If you do, if you have – then I dare you to deny that woman her hope, and to tell her she’s a fool.”

My response: “Ya know, I agree with this completely. I really feel it. After reading this story the day it came out, I sat on the couch, snuggled with my heart dog, the love of my life, and the ‘person’ closest to me. The only one in this world, who I’m sure knows me inside out.

I looked in his eyes, and asked myself, “If I had the money to clone Traum, would I?” I looked in his beautiful eyes, teared up, and decided, no. I would not. The dog may resemble my Traum, but could never be my Traum.

Do I fault someone for making a different heart decision than me? Ya know, we all take risks, we all make sacrifices, and some of us, are daring enough to follow dreams, goals, and ambitions. This women, simply choose to take the leap, and to try in every attempt, to have a dog like him, in the most likely to be successful manner possible.

My leap, would be to do what I did before Traum came into my life, and heart. After Robbie passed, I swore I could never love a dog so much again. Traum showed me I was wrong. I know someday, when Traum is gone, another canine blessing will show me that my heart still has room for another ‘heart dog’.”

I think in times of desperation, we latch onto whatever we can to find hope. The women who cloned her dog, did the exact same thing I would do… just in her own way. If cloning would bring back a replica of Traum, bring back his love, compassion, the connection, loyalty, and those nights when it felt like he was all I had, crying into his mane…. I know I could never say no. The thing is, cloning would never bring back my dog. It’d never bring back his soul. It’d never bring back his all knowing eyes of wisdom, and his quirky ‘I think I’m a single child’ complex.

In reality, for me, if I cloned Traum, I think I would actually belittle the love he and I share right now. Degrade who we are, what we are. No dog can ever again be Traum. Why would I want to try and make another? No matter how hard I tried, how much I hoped, or how much time and money I spent to recreate Traum, I feel as though it would only degrade the memories of what we have now. His soft head resting on my foot, and feeling his breath on my toes. I know he’s there, and because he’s close, I feel safe. He understands I need him, and sees it as his Cardi duty to take care of me. As much as science can try to sell that, it can never replicate the story of love. Just create a close phenotype.

This post was originally posted here July 21st 2008, but GoDaddy deleted and purged my entire hosting account and without a backup I lost everything I can not figure out a way to backdate posts, so I’m left not only copy/pasting old blog posts, but not having any sort of date order unless I figure out a way.
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I didn’t own him, and he had never lived here either. I only met him a small handful of times, but he was one of those animals, that just awes, and inspires you, and you can never forget.

Sisu as a baby, had an over-mothering mother, who took off most of his rear limbs while cleaning off afterbirth. After making it through that trauma so soon after birth, this miracle boy lived on, to act as though nothing was wrong. He walked on stub legs, which had to be washed, and babied.

Sisu was a very special rat, to everyone who met him. He was a sweet, strong, and kind soul. One of the ‘people’ who you looked into their eyes, and just saw this massive amount of strength, love, and passion. That rat was a super rat, who not only could live through the trauma of loosing 1/2 his rear limbs, but lived his life, as though nothing was wrong.

I don’t think anyone who met Sisu, could ever forget him. He was truely a blessing to all who had the opportunity to meet him.

Here’s a pic of King Sisu I took after his crowning as “The Rat King” at the ‘06 Mercer Island RatsPacNW show:

RIP sweet old man. the world is a lonelier, less snuggly place already without you.

Sisu was owned and bred by Lynn of ROUS Rattery in Seattle, but I’m grateful she shared that special little rodent with as much of the world as was possible. Sisu, he was really someone great, and I have no doubt that everyone who met him, feels the same.